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Thankyouforeverything(:
Tuesday, 12 May 2009Y

I feel really empty today.
sigh..he didn't come.
and i can't help but feel worried.
he didn't say a thing..
gosh!
argh.
Crazy thoughts start coming up to my mind which made me even more worried.
.......................................
I just hope nothing bad happened.
I just stared out of the window on the bus, listening to music.
The sky is so grey.
So is my mood.

I have many things going on in my mind now.
I don't know what to do.
I feel like my life now, is just like a countdown.
A countdown to going back to s'pore and being a zombie.
What's gonna happen to me back there?
I don't know.
wo bu zhi dao.

Exams.
I don't do well, I'm just gonna make my parents disappointed and in turn, make myself disappointed.
I don't think I've been this worried for exams before.

You.
What's gonna happen to us?
Just focus on the present..

There's this heavy weight I'm holding on to right now.
Maybe its just one of my mood swings.
cause i tend to be okay once i'm with him.
everything seems possible when i'm with him.
i feel more relaxed.
like nothing bad is gonna happen.
cause i know, he'll be right by my side.

I don't wanna leave.
Each day, each week, each second, each minute, each hour, brings me nearer to saying goodbye to everyone.
Each day, each week, each second, each minute, each hour, brings me nearer to not be with him.

Its hard.
But I know I can do it.
I faced this kinda pain before.
And I chose to face it again.
Saying goodbye, is never easy.
But in our lives, there'll always be times which we have to say it.

where are you right now?
I have something that I've always been wanting to tell you.



ends at Tuesday, May 12, 2009